


You Don’t Have to go Home, But you Can’t Stay Here

by Pipecleaner



Category: Psychonauts
Genre: BIG OL HONKIN RHOMBUS OF RUIN SPOILERS, Y’all ready for... angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-12
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2019-05-21 05:07:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14908917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pipecleaner/pseuds/Pipecleaner
Summary: Young Psychonaut Razputin is plagued by his recent discoveries made within the forgotten recesses of Dr. Loboto’s mind during the events at the undersea lab. Naturally, with every thought revolving around the matter, his only response is that he has an undying urge to remedy the other’s trauma.





	You Don’t Have to go Home, But you Can’t Stay Here

**Author's Note:**

> God there’s like barely any Psychonauts fanfics! And there’s almost none that talk about Loboto’s trauma...  
> Also I’m not sure if the other Psychonauts like Sasha and Milla could see into Loboto’s mind when Raz went in there? But I’m gonna assume no, so Raz is the only one who knows oooo
> 
> Side note: fuck E3 I WATCHED THE WHOLE PC GAMING SHOW AND THERE WAS NO PSYCHONAUTS 2 NEWS DAMN YOU DOUBLE FINE

His pulse pounded in his ears as he couldn’t pull his thoughts away from what he’d seen inside Loboto’s memory vault.

Raz had thought he’d seen the worst he possibly could have when it came to trauma- given that he’d seen the horrible, sad things that swelled in his friends’ pasts- but nothing could have prepared him for what he’d discovered inside Dr. Caligosto’s mind. It stayed with him, certain scenes playing on repeat; it was utterly traumatizing. Parents could be downright awful sometimes... take Oleander’s Father and even Raz’s own, but what Loboto’s parents did to him was absolutely _sickening_. Caligosto’s psychotic character was unfortunately starting to make sense to him.

He couldn’t get his mind to focus on anything else, thoughts dwelling on the recent discovery of who Caligosto used to be. _A psychic_ ; never in a million years would Raz have guessed that. But not only was he a psychic, he’d been born one, and had realized and controlled his telekinesis from such a young age as an infant.

It angered Raz to no end.

Loboto had been a gifted psychic at that. With the potential he held, he could have been one of the most powerful Psychonauts with proper training! _If_ he had got the proper training... if his parents had let him embrace his psychokinetic ability... if his parents hadn’t demonized him for being special.

If his parents hadn’t sent their only son away to be lobotomized in hopes of curing something that they didn’t even try to understand.

Raz couldn’t even properly help Caligosto through his trauma- _that’s_ the thing that bothered him the most. With others, he’d been able to travel deep into the forgotten and shunned recesses of their minds to physically remedy their mental plights for them.  
  
With Dr. Loboto, all he could do was watch as it was replayed for him.

—

“Raz? Hey, Earth to Raz!” Lili snapped her fingers in front of the boy’s face twice, waving her hand in front of his distant, green gaze to garner back his attention. Finally responding from his lost stupor, Raz gave a few blinks and his hand rose to rub his exhausted eyes, leaning back against the seat with a sigh.

“Yeah, sorry. I’m... still a little disoriented... like I said, it’s been a bit since I’ve been back in my body.” He gave a little shrug of his shoulders, flashing a weak smile to the girl across from him. Briefly, his eyes connected with Lili’s father and grand head of the Psychonauts, Truman Zanotto, who sat adjacent to her on her right, hands fiddling with his daughter’s music box. His gaze was soft, but hardened a bit as their eyes met, concerned.

“Ah, toughen up!” Lili’s voice suddenly snapped Raz’s attention back towards her, “I know you’re stronger than that. You did do a real awesome job back there, though.” She gave him a grin in response, crossing her arms over her chest as she leaned back and mirrored Raz’s relaxed pose.

“It sucks that you can’t even properly rest when you get back. You’ve got a whole lot to tell the people at HQ.”

Again, Raz rubbed his eyes, giving a tired, muffled laugh at her words. “Yeah- Yeah, I know.”

He didn’t want to let the others know just how much his head hurt- there was a lot swirling around in there still, and he’d hate for one of them to dig around and discover Loboto’s trauma that way. He was keeping it a secret; for why, he wasn’t exactly sure. Maybe it was just a little too private to share with anyone just yet. Private, and downright unbelievably shocking. Raz was still in awe over it, even.

With that being said, he could use some Advil.

“The whole story _is_ pretty wild- Who would have guessed that Dr. Loboto was behind it again? ...What got into him anyways? I mean, I know he’s crazy, but to blow up your entire secret lab and all your work like that all of a sudden seems pretty insane, don’t you think?”

Raz avoided eye contact, shifting his gaze to the most-likely expensive carpeted floor of the plane.

“...You said it yourself; he’s crazy.” He tacked on another shrug of his shoulders and a tiny grin.

Raz hoped that was enough to dismiss any further conversation about Loboto. That was quite the can of worms to open anyways.

“Perhaps we should give him a moment to rest, even for just a minute. I’m sure Sasha and I can handle the majority of the questions.” Milla, overhearing the kids’ conservation, offered up her two cents. Raz, even though he was a little hesitant to accept, still quite liked the sound of that, and he gave a nod of confirmation at her.

“I’ll be able to provide enough information to keep the Psychonauts back at the lab out of your hair for a few hours. Don’t worry.” Truman added on, his gaze once again soft.

Raz shifted a little in his spot, still slightly unsure, but satisfied with the solution that was given.

“Alright.... but uh, Make sure to leave the really good questions for me though, okay? I have to make an appearance to my adoring fans sooner or later, and there better be some story left for me to tell!” Half joking, Raz pointed a demeaning finger up toward the cockpit at the two seated there, and Sasha responded with a little hum.

“Of course, Razputin.” Uh, did he understand that Raz was just joking around?

After that small conversation was held, the rest of the plane ride back to HQ was relatively silent, save for a few comments made by Oleander about his newly-acquired mermaid tail. Raz was looking forward to when they arrived at HQ, because watching the camp counselor hobble about unevenly with that thing was pretty entertaining.

It was kind of a shame that that was about the only thing he was looking forward to when they landed, even with how excited he was to finally get to see and explore the Psychonauts HQ; Raz was just afraid that he was going to let something slip about Loboto, what with all the skilled telepathic psychics running around the hub.

Raz closed his eyes and leaned back against the seat once more to do away with his overcrowded thoughts. Unfortunately, he could feel his headache grow worse.


End file.
